But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
do herpes really smell.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize