Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
