I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
