When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
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