Those balls look pretty dangerous.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
no more duck duck goose at the bar
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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