8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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