I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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