dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
