Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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