You can't motorboat a personality
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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