:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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