I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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