i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
