butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
