Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
