your thong is hanging out like whoa
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize