We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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