Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize