just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
