I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize