i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Randomize
