I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Randomize
