I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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