I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
