Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
