I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
