if we break up, who will get the dealer?
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize