I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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