i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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