I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
