So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
