my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
They have beer where we have blood.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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