I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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