p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
