god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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