If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
