STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Me too!
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
