Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
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