I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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