I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
It's never too late to be topless.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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