just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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