I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
