So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
