I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
The struggles of a small town man whore
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize