stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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