office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
