she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Randomize
