We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
