I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
