thus making me awesome and them whores
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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