STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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