She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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