if you like me you must not know who I am
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
